Posted in Pensive Pondering, Uncategorized

Letter to the Husband

Dear Husband,

I choose not to speak but to write this as I know my words may unsettle you. However please remember my love for you remains forever true.

I left my home and opted to stay with you not because my family didn’t want me anymore; but because I chose to make a family with you and your people

I relinquished my identity and adopted your name not because I didn’t like mine; but because I chose to be yours completely. Continue reading “Letter to the Husband”

Posted in Pensive Pondering, Uncategorized

Time for the NEW

Beautiful Spring!

The old ones leave and depart, making way for the new…pretty tender leaves springing from the grand old tree outside my window 🙂
Such is life too. The old makes way for new. All you need is to continue the nourishment deep inside.
#spring #colors #springtime #nature #naturephotography #positivity #lifeisbeautiful#lifelessons #newbeginnings #newlife #natureisbeautiful #natureteaches#lifegoeson

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Profound conversations with my 5 year old baby girl.

Being a mother of a two year old beautiful princess, this post really made me realise how vulnerable life is..and how precious are the little moments each day brings….
I know I cannot even begin to feel the loss Zoey’s parents have gone through…but my prayers and wishes go out to them…I am inspired by their strength and positivity…may this positivity stay with all of all, all through…
And yes, Zoey…I am sure Krishna is taking lots of care of you and making sure that you are having fun….

withoutmyzoey

As a recently bereaved mom, one of my fears is that, as the years go by, the memories of my baby girl may begin to fade. I hope to remember everything about my baby ….her likes , her dislikes, her cute mannerisms, her know-it-all attitude, her saying “I love you too mom” ….just to name a few things. But I know it’s only a matter of time. New memories will take the place of old ones and the old ones will tend to fade. So writing has become very important for me. If it’s all written down somewhere with all the nitty-gritty details, I know I can read it for years to come and know that her memories are intact.

These days I find myself trying to recollect our conversations with her during those last 12 weeks of her life.Yes those memories tend to bring tears to my eyes …….However…

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I am so lost without you..

Falling in love was a choice I had made long ago..but falling in love with you: I was left with no choice! When I look back today and think about the days when we were “friends” and just that, I cannot think of a moment when I did not like being with you. I cannot think of a time when you did not try to make me happy (or keep me happy).

Love was just an after-effect: of all the times you made great for me, of all the difficulties you made easy for me, of all the moments you made memories for me, of all the failures you taught me to succeed in, of all the inspirations, of all the scary moments you made light for me, of coffees & conversations & canteens…..

And to have you in my life after all the struggle, the resistance, the fight is just so worth it! I am so glad I did not break, I did not give away to the resistance, I did not bow down…I am lucky to have you…we were meant to be not just friends, but best friends forever…

Today, after all these hard times, I cannot afford to let you go away from me even for a single day…and that too to a location almost 24 hours away by the fastest means of transportation is unthinkable! I cannot sleep, I cannot think, I cannot write, I cannot be ‘me’ without you…As I wrote earlier for you “Sleep lost, hope lost, happiness lost….I am so lost without you”…Missing you